|My cheese ball|
I told you guys that I have shared custody of my child. Beyond that....you don't know much else.
My baby has spent her 4 entire years on this planet with me or people that I choose her to be with. In those years, this wasn't her dad very often. Not on my part, but his. Now, I'm not talking trash, nor am I going to. If I was, this post would be a lot longer.
The agreement that we came to (with the help of our attorneys of course) was every other weekend and a certain night of the week would be his time. And during the summer she would live with him for a week and with me for a week.
|I look terrible...I know.|
But yeah, it's kind of nice. I'm young and while she's away...mommy may play. Now don't go thinking I get all crazy and pull out the shortest dresses I own and skank it up at my local sleaze bar. I'm not that kind of parent. lol. But I sleep in, I eat what I want when I want to, I watch adult television and say saynora to nickelodeon and Disney for a week. And it feels great. I do what I want when I want to.
But I still miss her soooo bad. I'd give anything to have her at home. I'd watch a million Dora's if it meant that she could hang out with me. A week isn't very long. But it is when your heart hurts and you miss somebody.
|Mother's Day 2012|
As I've gotten older I've started to not care for Summer. Now, I really don't like it. Each day the sun is up longer....and it reminds me of the time that she won't be around. I won't be looking forward to Summer anymore. My heart goes away during this time of the year. I look forward to Fall when we spend more time together and I don't have to give her away every other week.
I know it's good for her to see him. I just don't think it's healthy for anyone to live at a house at a week at a time though. Can you imagine how much that sucks? I know I wouldn't like it. I know she doesn't like it. She does love her daddy though. I know that she is happy over there, but I don't believe she is happy with the situation.
There's so much more I could tell you...but this seems all for now. Such a serious post for the almost end of our week. But, she leaves me again today. And so for now it's all on my mind.