Friday, August 30, 2013

See Ya August

It's Friday. I'm neither excited or disappointed about this. Weird right. My thoughts are jumbled today so youu're gonna get brain mush. Are you ready?

- My draft for my fantasy team is tomorrow. Did I tell you what the name was? Well, incase I didn't it's Tittsburg Feelers. Thanks to Sarah for the wonderful idea. And none of my friends that are playing know that I have a blog so they think I'm a creative genius. Thanks again Sarah! I've done thismuch to prepare for the draft tomorrow. I know, I know. How am I gonna win if I haven't even looked at anything. Last year's winner just picked hot guys and she won. I'm sure Blake is gonna sit me down and teach me way too much for my brain to handle tomorrow.

- Damn Texans beat the Cowboys last night. My blogland bestie Jordan loves the Texans. She's on cloud nine today. I told her not to get used to that shit. What's worse is that I heard the stadium was full of more Texan fans than Cowboy fans. AT OUR OWN STADIUM. Pathetic. I bet they're just pretending they usck this season that way when pre-season is over they can kick ass.

I shouldn't make fun of my own team but this is hilarious. Best caption wins!

- Why are my bills always due at the beginning of the month. My 3 most expensive ones are all due the first 3 days of the month. I'm poor for like a week and a half after that. And about the time I catch back up and think, "Oh, I can go shopping! Woohoo!" it's bill time again. Jeez, life is always getting in the way of fun stuff.

- I'm glad August is over. All it brought to the game was shitty weather. The first two weeks all it did was rain. I thought about building an ark. It's partially started in Blake's back yard. Then, after the rain it brought a terrible heat wave. See ya next year August. You suck, nobody's going to miss you. And while we're at it, let's just skip September and get straight to the good stuff - October! I have so much going on that month and I can't wait!

- If you follow me on insta or twitter than you know that my other blogland bestie Meg sent me a sweet little package. See, here in the middle of the flyover states, it's hard to get craft beer. We get all the trends last, after they're not trends anymore, and it's no different with craft beers. Meg had written a post about fall beers and one of them she loves is called Pumking. I just had to have some, and not to my surprise, you can't get any around here. So the sweet girl sent me a bottle! I've been holding out on trying it but I'll try it tomorrow. I need to know if I like it because I found other websites that will ship it to me. Can't wait for that!

- Work is sucking right now. Apparently when the kiddies go back to school nobody comes out to eat. And when they do they leave their wallets and their brains at home. Speaking of work, I know that you guys love work stories so every Wednesday I try and blog about some. Come check it out.

It's Friday and I need to back my azz up with Whitney. My favorite song off of Luke's new album is finally on GrooveShark. Thanks to whoever uploaded it. I tried but my iTunes is all fucked up so I couldn't do it. Enjoy. Peace out kids.

Venus Trapped in Mars

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Waiting Tables Wednesday w.2

You know what...I get paid to watch people eat. It's weird. I mean, when you think of serving you don't think to yourself "oh yeah, my job is going to consist of watching people eat." At least I didn't, not until another server brought it to my attention. And I haven't forgotten it since.

A couple of weeks ago I was waiting on this nice elderly couple. That's about all that comes into OG, but you still needed to know that. As I was watching these people eat, I noticed that they hardly said anything to each other. Unlike our generation, it wasn't because they were nose deep in their facebook feed. I don't really know why it was.

But it got me thinking. Which I do a lot when I'm working because when we're slow, it's just what I do to make the time pass. Do people ever run out of things to say to each other? Can you be with somebody for so long that you don't have anything left to say? Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

I want this.
I can see both sides, because I've thought about it a lot. My first thought was that they were so content in their relationship that they've had together that they can just sit in silence and feel content. I'm a romanticist so I wanted to believe this. I want to believe that people are so happy that they just don't have to talk. I mean, sometimes Blake and I don't talk to each other. And it's not because we're unhappy. I know that some people will disagree with that but to each their own.

Or are they just not speaking to each other because they're unhappy? But they won't get a divorce because they've been together for so long that it's just convenient and easy to stay together. I really don't want this to be the case. I can't imagine just being together because it's what you're used to.

I mean there's always something to say. Whether it be I love you, go fuck yourself, or you're hogging the blankets, there's always something. But isn't there always a story to tell? Do you think people run out of stories? If that's the case, maybe you're around each other too much. But that's an easy fix.

I know that I don't ever want to stop having stories to tell. I don't want to stop talking to Blake.

What are your thoughts? Do you think people can really run out of stuff to say to each other? Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

10 Things...

If you're tired of VMA talk...well I'm sorry. I just didn't wanna blog yesterday because I was actually doing something productive for once. Write that shit down.

So VMA's...something I watch every year. Something I've watched every year for as long as I can remember. I love them. I remember when MTV still played music videos. I remember making the video, TRL with Carson Daly (that's important). That probably means I'm too old for MTV now and days. But I still have to watch. I gotta keep up on the teen pornstars moms yo! I need to experience the culture of West Virginia and their crazy ass antics. Let's not forget about wife doesn't even know what it is. She needs to watch MTV.'s my list of thoughts on the VMA's this year. 

1. Fuck yes I was watching for N*SYNC. Was there anybody out there besides my wife who wasn't? And I'm not ashamed but there were tears. I told you I'm a crier. My mom even called me out on crying over the phone after we watched it. The 11 year old me was pumped. The 22 year old me was even more pumped. They paved the way for the rest of the so called boy bands. I'm looking at you One Direction. 

2. Kanye...what can you say about him. I'm not sure I like him as a man but as a rapper he's a genius. The only person that can get away with being called Yeesus. Why was he hiding in the dark the whole time? 

3. Katy Perry sang that song Snore...I mean Roar. I'm not a fan. Never have been and don't think I will be. The winner of that fight may have been her, but Russell won the whole divorce. I mean it was just a snoozefest of a finale. I was really disappointed. I thought there would have been explosions or fireworks or something. Nope. Nothing.

4. Bruno Mars was interesting. See, I don't listen to the radio. I don't listen to a lot of music on Songza that isn't country. I'm not a snob, I just don't like change. I like Bruno. I enjoy everything he's done but Grenade. I've never heard a song from him unless it was on the radio. So as far as I was concerned, he didn't sing a lot about gorilla sex. That song was just fucking weird. I like it but I felt awkward listening to it with anybody around. I think my head was tilted to the side the entire time he was performing. But he did a great job. I love listening to him sing.

5. From ramen noodle hair to Hollywood hottie, Justin has done it all. And last night was amazing. They should have just let him perform for Katy too. He's Justin Timberlake. I think he had it right when he said he still runs this bitch. Yes sir, you do. And I had a great tweet to it. Ok, the tweet wasn't great but my hashtag was. And I would love it if it somehow found it's way to Sami's twitter recap. *hint hint* Kidding. Not really.

6.  Why wasn't there a host? That part left me baffled. The whole show was thrown off to me. I mean, we don't even have to use Kevin Hart ever again because he made fun of N*SYNC, but we need somebody to hold it all together.

7. Little girls shouldn't be allowed to vote for anything. Robin Thicke, Bruno Mars, Justin Timberlake, Pink, Rihanna, and Fun were robbed of awards last night. I know that some of them got some but man for the most part it was less than talented "singers" winning. No thanks.

8. Taylor Swift still can't dance. Maybe she should take some lessons from Miley. At least her surprise face was gone though. It only took like 6 years. Maybe we only have a few left until she learns new dance moves. And why was the camera guy always shooting back to her. Nobody cares.

9. Then there was Miley. I didn't hate it. It was raunchy. But it's what she wanted. She got attention. It wasn't positive attention but it was attention. I say get it girl. Do your thing because you rocked it. Do some squats too though. And stop kissing and grinding on married dudes. I don't care if you hump inanimate objects or twerk, just leave married guys alone. He has kids!

10. Let's all boycott the VMAs next year. I bet they won't compare to this year. And we're too old to watch this shit anyway. Seriously, do you know who any of those newbies were? I didn't.

Friday, August 23, 2013

Lies the TV Tells Me

I love tv. Just love it. But sometimes it lies. Big massive sloppy lies. That piss me off. So today, for things I don't love, I thought I'd tell you about the lies the tv tells me.

1. ITT Tech is bullshit. The tv says that ITT Tech is a great school and tons of people go there. They say that it will change your whole life. Well guess what? I've never met ANYBODY who's gone to ITT Tech which means it's also never changed the life of somebody I know. So what's the deal ITT Tech? When ya just gonna go away?

2. I saw a commercial for that new Nokia Lumia edition 5846598165. You know the one? With the awesome 41 megapixel- I take great wonderful pictures in the dark-you just have to have me right this second phone? Yeah, I heard that it's not that great. I mean, I was gonna buy this phone just for the camera. Ok, not really but I thought about it. Then the AT&T guys told me that it's really not that good and made fun of me for believing everything I see on tv. Like that commercial. And me being me and not believing anything anybody tells me, I trusted my good friend google to show me some pictures. They didn't look that great. They didn't prove they were any better than my trusty iphone. Lies Nokia, LIES.

Found here.

3. Chef Lorena for Taco Bell makes this great "gourmet, healthyish" food and we should all love it. Bitch please. I don't want Taco Hell to be gourmet or healthy. How bad it really is - is what makes it so great. I don't even need to elaborate on this one. And Taco Bell isn't healthy or gourmet no matter how hard you try Miss Chef Lorena. Sorry.

4. Tampon commercials. Everybody knows that a woman is not that happy go lucky while it's her time. No, it's not all rainbows, puppies, and unicorns. It's get-me-chocolate-and-leave-me-the-hell-alone-or-I'll-bite-your-head-off. We don't do gymnastics, go shopping, or even look slightly not miserable during that week. Quit lying.

Really that's all I've got. Just 4 commercials that are getting on my nerves lately. I'm sure there are more but that's all I could stand to watch. I have a DVR for a reason. I can't remember life without one and I don't want to.

I'm linking up with the craziest of them all. The one who gets her vajay waxed and lived to tell about it. Miss Yoga Pants herself.

Real quick back story before I go. 
At OG we used to play old Italian music of course. Well, I guess people started to complain so they changed it up. We now get to listen to modern music. And it's fucking weird. I was hosting last week when we heard the beginning of this song. Well, of course they're not gonna play this song in a family restaurant it was the original jazz version. But it still made me want to get down.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

I Live In My Car

I know that I've told you before that my car is a mess. And it really is. However, I've been doing a lot better about keeping it clean. It bugs the shit out of me when it's messy. It's ridiculous the amount of stuff you'd find in my car.

I could live in it though. Seriously. There's so much random shit that I would be ok. So, if you ever see somebody who doesn't look homeless but it looks like they're living out of their car, it might just be me.

This is the passenger side. Always the messiest part. 

I thought I'd take you through a tour of things you might need at any time. My car is like a big purse.

You need to work on something? I have a screw driver you can use. I used it once and never took it back in. And, if you're phone is in bad shape, don't worry. I have a brand new phone case in there too.

Hungry and you don't know what Olive Garden has? Well, I can help you out. Just feel to skim through my product knowledge book and find something that makes you happy. 

I know it's the middle of August but incase it's snowing, I have snow boots and a hoodie too. And another phone case. Don't worry, we have plenty of phone cases. Mountain dew for when we get thirsty and socks if your feets get cold.

So I should clean it out I guess. But I don't wanna. Do you wanna come clean it out for me? Please. You can keep whatever you find that you like. Except for anything in my purse or related to Luke Bryan. 

Monday, August 19, 2013

She's 21

Yep, you read that right. My momma is 21...again. (41 for those who don't wanna do the math.) Shhh don't tell her that I told you. And I was wrong with my math up there. Oops. I put 42 and believed it was right for like 10 minutes. Good thing for editing.

Today is her birthday. 41 years ago, she came into this world and she has made quite a bit of difference. I mean without her, there wouldn't be me. 

I just want her to know that I love her very much. At times, I can be a little brat, I know that. But you put up with all my bullshit. Thank you. 

I could say thank you for a lot of things. And I do thank you for all the things. I just can't write it all here. This would be the never ending blog post. 

You better enjoy being 21 again. It won't happen again until you're 63. Bahahaha. The day is yours. Do with it as you please. But there better be some drinkage happening. 

So let's play dress up. And go grab a beer. Because you're the best mom. Love you.

Friday, August 16, 2013

Drink A Beer

Dear Weekend, Thanks for showing up but you can just keep moving on. I work doubles all weekend. Womp Womp. I haven't worked all weekend long in a long while. And Erntefest is this weekend and I don't know if I can go. But I really wanna.

Dear Work, let's make some of that money ok! I need it. Oh, and thanks for acting like I was going to get my vacation check. Yeah, I didn't. I'm pretty irritated about that.

Dear Blog, we're in a rut this week. That's ok. Just gotta get out of it.

Dear Fantasy Football, you and I need to talk. You need to tell me what website to go to so I know what in the hell I'm looking for. I read Sarah's post but still, I need more. It seemed so much easier last year when manfriend was doing it.

Dear Blog Friends, I love you dearly. Sure do. Sorry if stuff around here is stale. It happens. Keep sticking around. I'm sure it'll be over soon.

Dear Luke Bryan, Thanks for the new album. I love it. But let's stick to singing, that rapping business you try is just not you. Leave it to Blake or the rappers. And announce your new tour dates already. I'm waiting mister!

Dear Target, Now that the kiddies are back at school I can shop in peace. I can't wait.

Dear Fall, I'm ready. I know I keep saying this. I only keep saying it because well I just want you to be here faster. Leggings, sweaters, boots, hot cider, pumpkin everything! And the holidays that you bring, the best! Please hurry now. This teasing shit where it's 55 in the morning and then 80 in the afternoon is for the birds.

Dear Pumking Beer, I'm so ready to try you. Thanks to my sweet bloggy friend Megan my dreams will come true!

And of course, it's time to #backthatazz up with Whitsicle!

Since Mr. Bryan decided to drop his album this week, I'll leave you with one of the good ones. If somebody would like to upload their album to grooveshark that would be awesome. I was going to but the itunes on my computer is stupid. It doesn't even have half of the songs I've bought from them in my library on my computer. Anybody know how to fix that?? Do I just need to sync them up again?

Thursday, August 15, 2013

The First Day

Well, we can't look back now. My little person is off at her first day of kindergarten. I can't believe we made it this far.

I'm more than proud of her. She walked into that classroom and didn't look back. There were no tears, no upsets, nothing. Just her being a big girl. I can't believe that it's finally time for school.

I'm a mixed ball of emotions. Happy, sad, nervous, anxious, all of them. It's so weird to me. I can't wait to help out this year though. In elementary school the holiday parties were my jam. I remember that my momma would always come to the Halloween and Valentines Day parties. She didn't have a choice with the Valentines Day one. It's kinda my birthday. I'm ready to do that for my person.

I'm ready for this journey. Let's do it!

And I'm happy school is back in session. No more little shits at work, I can roam around Target and Walmart and not have to worry about them. Hell yes!

One more thing, this morning the weather was perfect fall weather. I'm talking sweaters and everything. Sounds about right! I'm more than ready, especially since school has started. IT'S TIME!

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree now does it?

And on that note, I'm out. Gonna take a nice nap because I can do that now. There's nobody to tell me otherwise!

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Waiting Tables Wednesday

I know that you all love some good ol' OG stories. I can't blame you. I enjoy reading other people's rants about whatever restuarant they work at. It's a good time had by all. And boy, do I have a story for you.

So, incase you haven't seen any commercials and/or are living under a rock, our Unlimited Pasta Bowl is back. Cue sadness and anger from any OG server anywhere. The people that come out for this defintiely let their freak flags fly. They don't give a fuq. Unlimited pasta for $10?!?!?! Fuck yeah, I'll take 5489461 refills please.

Well, Tuesday night, as I was hungover and serving, my last table of the night came in. And I could just tell. I could just tell that they were pot loving hippies. No shame in their game. I don't really care either way, but sometimes I judge (ok, I judge a lot) and I didn't figure there would be a nice tip in this for me. So, seeing as how I had 2 other tables with the possibility of bigger tips, these guys were at the bottom of the totem pole. But none of my tables were needy so they got good service.

It was a mom, her daughter, and her daughter's boyfriend. I had somebody else get their drinks because I was a little busy at the moment. I went up to their table and just knew that pasta bowl was what they were gonna order. And they did. All 3 of them. Not a big deal. They all wanted salad too. So I brought their salad out and went along with my little routine. I left them be, because honestly, they didn't really want much at the beginning.

As my other tables left, I started to hokey pokey the floor around them and fill my sugars and salt and pepper. As I was hokeying, I saw a pot leaf tattoo on the boyfriend's leg. So it was confirmed. I finally went back and asked if I could refill anything for them. They were still on first drinks, first bowl, first salad, and first bread after 25 minutes. That shit is crazy for Olive Garden. They said yeah and were ready to place their refill orders. This is where shit started being weird. See, you can add unlimited protein options as well, for an extra $2.99. Well, the mom and the daughter didn't get any extras on their first bowl but they wanted to see if they could get some on the second. I told them that if I could it would charge them. I couldn't figure out how to get it on there (I've since learned) and told them I couldn't do it. I honestly didn't want to take the time to find a manager and ask. When they ordered their refills, they told me that they had a gift card and really didn't want to go over that amount. No big deal, I figured it was a $50 gift card.

I continue on with my business. And now they start to ask for refills of everything. I tell them I'll bring them new drinks. They try to hand me their glasses. I'm like, "No, I'll bring you another glass." They fought with me about it until I told them that we were supposed to bring fresh glasses for refills. And then the mom asked for more cheesy bread. Wait what? We don't have cheesy bread. She meant breadsticks but continued to call it cheesy bread for the rest of their dinner. As I'm cleaning again, I hear the boyfriend say "We need to go to the store before they close so I can get the fake stuff. I'm out." I thought to myself, well, good for you for not having any shame and making sure everybody knows. lol.

As they're finishing up I go and get their check. I come back and place it on the table and give them my little check talk. I continue to clean and I hear the mom tell the kids that nice fancy places like this already include your tip in the ticket.

Great, there goes my tip. I listen to her blabber for about two more minutes before I have to say something. I get all polite and say "Ma'am, I don't mean to interrupt, but I want you to know that at Olive Garden, we never put any gratuities on the ticket unless there are 8 or more entrees. We don't want you to feel pressured to tip." She replied with "Oh, no honey, I'm not talking about you." Bitch please! I just heard what you said.

I take their book back to cash them out and they have teh gift card and cash. The ticket was only like $40 bucks. I was confused at this point. Their gift card was only for $25. They seriously thought that they could come in, have two $10 dinners, and a $13 dollar dinner, plus three pops for about $9 all for $25??

At least I got a good laugh.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Taste of Tuesday

Hey hey happy Tuesday. It's my Monday. Womp womp. I had a nice little three and a half day weekend and now I have to go back to reality. Weird.

I love to cook. I don't do it very often but I really do enjoy it. My favorite things are simple and easy. Of course. If something is too complicated than I just really don't want to have anything to do with it. Occassionally I'll try but most of the time I'll pray somebody else makes it for me or I find an easier way. All about simplicity. And what takes the least amount of dishes possible. This also means that my repertoire of recipes is really small. Sad face.

Well, Saturday I decided that I wanted to make dinner. But I didn't wanna make the same old things I always make. So I'm going through Pinterest (where else would I look?) looking for ideas when I think "Self, you've always wanted to try the chicken parm at work. Why don't you make your own??" And it sounded like a good idea. I went a little off of a recipe I found but just for the directions on what method to cook it and for how long.

I thought I'd share with you today =) I don't really measure when I cook so just use what you think is right.

You'll need 
- Boneless chicken breasts (I used 4)
- 2 eggs 
- Bread crumbs, any style/flavor you want. (I used italian style)
- Marinara sauce. (I wasn't feeling good so I just grabbed a jar. Do me a favor and share your favorite homemade recipe. No chunks please!)
- Mozzarella cheese (I bought fresh, but whatever works for you is great!)

That's it. Simple is the key to life. 

1. Set oven to 350 degrees to preheat. 
2. Coat chicken in egg. Make sure it's nice and eggy. It feels really gross. At least to me.
3. Roll the chicken in your breadcrumbs. Like get as much as you possibly can on there. Make sure it's coated. Or not. You're choice. 

4. Place chicken on a tin foiled cookie sheet and place in the oven. 
5. Bake for 30 minutes. 
6. Add mozzarella cheese and bake for another 5 minutes. 
And you're done! 

Add as much marinara sauce as you want. And a side. If that's your thing. I love carbs so I added spaghetti. I got a little too much sauce too. I just need somebody to convince me that spaghetti squash really doesn't taste terrible and I'll try it. 

I was so exicted to try it that I forgot to take a decent pictures. This is terrible I know. I'm embarrassed. 

Of course there are things I will do differently next time. 
- I'll add salt and pepper to the eggs and a couple of my own spices to the breadcrumbs. 
- I won't wait as long as 30 minutes to add the cheese. I like mine a little more melted than it is. 
- I'll remember to tenderize the chicken. Like I said, I didn't feel good and really wanted to eat soon. 
- I might place them in a glass pan and bake them with sauce and cheese on top. Maybe some grated cheese on top of the chicken then the sauce and fresh mozzarella. Who knows. 

Have fun with it! Make it your own. And be sure to tell me about it. 

I'm linking up with Ashley and Jessica for Taste of Tuesday.
Hopefully I can come up with something else to post this month. 

Monday, August 12, 2013

I Learned Two Things

I actually had a post started for today but we got some family pictures over the weekend. I just wanted to share some and show you that yeah, maybe we like each other a little bit over here. But don't get too excited. I think my favorites are of Teagan. Of course.

I learned two things from this 
 - I have no jawline and I pretty much look like a cow. Woof.
 - Even if your dress seems long enough, you should probably test it out. In all the pictures of us sitting down my ass is almost hanging out. 

All photos courtesy of Big Grin Photography.

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Summer's End

So the summer is winding down and coming to a close. I know to most of you, that sucks. I'm not entirely disappointed though. Summer just isn't my jam. Except for tanks. I love those.

I didn't talk about this a lot this year, just because. I talked about it last summer but not many of you were here then. During the summer Teagan alternates weeks with her dad and myself. I'm not gonna lie, a week of peace is often nice, but it gets old after awhile. The days just seem to be longer and I find myself to be bored and not have somebody to talk to.

At the start of the summer everything was fine. Teagan was pumped to go to her dad's and wanted to go all the time. As it's gone on though, it's gotten rough. This last time when they came to pick her up she cried. She didn't want to go at all. I felt terrible, but at the same time, I felt good. Finally they (her dad is married) knew how I felt when she was so happy to go with me. But what do I do when she's crying because she doesn't want to go? It's court mandated and I know that her dad wants to see her.

Now, if they were cordial and nice, I would have felt bad for them. But they aren't. I'm not gonna spill all the drama on here because it's just too much. But I feel that most of the time when it comes to them, I get the short end of the stick.

I guess I'm just trying to say that I'm glad that summer is coming to a close. I'm going to be around my baby kindergartner more. She's gonna be with me, where I feel she belongs. I won't ever take away her dad's time to see her, I'm not that terrible of a human - yet. But home is where the heart is, and my heart is with her.

As for kindergarten...holy shit how did we get here already? I'm a nervous wreck. It's not the same as head start where she went before. This is the beginning of the next 13-18 years of her life. And she's not a baby anymore. Wahh. But I'm excited too. I love school carnivals and elementary school parties. They're my favorite!

So bring on the fall...because I'm ready.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

I Could Bum Around All Day

I told you guys sometime last week that I was a part of a pj party swap. I got some awesome goodies from Beth at Living a Goddess Life. She is amazing. I mean, she mean the girl makes most of her own food from scratch. I look at Taco Bell and think "Thank god for you or I'd be starving."

She sent me an awesome package. Everything she sent had a sticky note on it telling me how we would use them at our own sleepover. I think I hit the swap gold! Here's the goods.

She outdid herself but I love it all! There are a few things not pictured but Teagan has already ran off with them, but what can I do? And those pants? to DIE for. I have a pair like them and they are super super soft. I wanna buy Target out of them and just wear them every day. Don't judge. The shirt is super soft too! I already wore it and that's why it's all wrinkly and stuff. Judge away now.

Enjoy Life

I'm alive guys. I don't know if you noticed but I was absent yesterday. If you saw twitter, then you know why. If not, let me show ya.

And half of it doesn't even make sense so obviously I was still drunk. Yesterday sucked. Especially when I had to work. But it was good times and completely worth it. I got to hangout with my wife and we got trashed, like the light weights we are. I only consumed 3 longs islands, 2 bud light platinums, and a shot of patron.  But it worked it's magic.

We started off at Applebees because they have 2-for-1s and half price apps after 9. I even took my new friend Cooper, who I created at build-a-bear, and he enjoyed some long islands too. I took to instagram to prove it. I don't usually bring stuffed animals with me everywhere I go but I knew it would get laughs so I did. Or wtf looks and that worked too. And brought me laughs.

yes, he wears cowboy boots

I know we all just want to be skinny but I love food so much. So much. But I've decided that unless I'm eating my parmesan and shrimp sirloin from Applebees, I don't need to order food. We ordered too much and it was just ok.

those pretzels aren't the greatest and they were a lot bigger than expected!

After that we came back home and continued to drink some more. Only this time we did it on my front porch while it rained. That was some of the loudest, most bangiest, thunder I've heard in a long time. It gave me heart attacks on occassion. We took too many selfies, laughed way to hard, and had in all around good time. I'm ready to do it again.

only decent one and we still can't get it right.

that's rain, not beer.

Sorry about the shitty quality, I don't have a good steady hand when I've been drinking. Just some of the classicness that is us. Wanna come hang out?

p.s. Drunk Chloe came out, she made me pee outside. More than once.