Traditions

I love traditions. I'm not very traditional though. I can't get with that. Anyway...the holidays bring my favorite traditions. 

- I always get together with my dad's side of the family and we have Christmas on Christmas Eve. All the great food and company help a little ;). 

- I always always wake up at my mommas on Christmas morning. I always try to stay in bed as long as possible otherwise everybody would be up at 5! 

- with my momma I always open my stocking first. There's really no reason but it's how we've always done things. 

This year though, the traditions will be am little different. And I don't know how I really feel about that. 

This year will be my first Christmas in five years to wake up without teagan. It's his Christmas this year, per our parenting plan. And honestly, it sucks. 

I don't know what it will be like to wake up without her and I don't really know if I want to. I know it won't be the same without her. 

I've tried to stay positive, for the sake of having some "Christmas spirit", but it's awfully hard. 

And we always do my Christmas Eve at my grandma's at night. It always gives me time to get ready for the day. And it ends late, which makes it that much easier to get an excited little girl in bed. But tho year we have to do in the afternoon because she has to be with her dad at 9. I won't be able to put her to bed and hear how excited she is to get up tomorrow morning. 

And Blake has to work and won't make it in time for our gift exchange. That bums me out too. 

So, I guess maybe I'll have to make new traditions. Ones that will still make me feel like it's the holidays. 

But this still sucks. 

Merry Christmas y'all! See ya sometime after the holidays. I hope you have a great Christmas!